If It Was Done to Jesus, Who Am I?

Sometimes, life has a way of knocking you down, especially when it comes to relationships. When I face challenges, there’s a saying I often repeat to myself, almost like a shield against the sting of pain: “If it was done to Jesus, who am I for it not to be done to me?” Reading John 13 this morning brought these words to life in a way that felt deeply personal.

• “Most assuredly, I say to you, a servant is not greater than his master; nor is he who is sent greater than he who sent him.” (John 13:16)
• “He who eats bread with Me has lifted up his heel against Me.” (John 13:18)

These scripts struck a familiar chord. Betrayal is something I know all too well. Whether it’s in personal relationships or the professional sphere, I’ve learned the hard way that not everyone who breaks bread with you has your best interest at heart. People you care for and trust can, and sometimes will, turn against you. And while I’ve adapted in some ways, it doesn’t do much to soften the blow.

I’ve always tried to see the good in people. I’m the type of person who gives 100% of their trust upfront, no strings attached. I open my heart, I stretch myself thin if it means helping someone else, and I gladly take on the role of the giver, even when it costs me.For years, I thought this was simply the right thing to do. I thought it was love in action. But time has shown me that trust is not as sacred to everyone as it is to me. People have stepped into my life under false pretences, pretending to have my back while secretly taking advantage of my generosity. Others have even claimed to come in the name of God, using His name to disguise their selfish intentions. The Judas parallels in my life have been glaring, and every instance has left its scars.

When I read, “He who eats bread with Me has lifted up his heel against Me,” I feel the truth of Jesus’s experience echoing in my own. It always seems to be the ones closest to you, the ones you’ve broken bread with. These aren’t casual acquaintances; they’re people you’ve trusted, confided in, even sacrificed for. That’s what makes betrayal hurt so deeply.

Betrayal in Business

Betrayal doesn’t stay confined to personal relationships. Unfortunately, it often shows up in business too. Over the years, I’ve faced more than my fair share of professional heartbreaks. Employees I trusted betrayed me for their own gains. Business partners entered agreements with ulterior motives, taking what they could and leaving chaos in their wake. The worst part? Some even came pretending to share the same faith, using the name of God to disguise greed and selfishness.

At first, each instance felt like a personal failure. I wondered if I was too naive, too trusting, or simply too soft to survive in the business world. But again, I go back to that saying in my head, “If it was done to Jesus, who am I for it not to be done to me?” Even the greatest teacher and leader faced betrayal, so why would I expect to escape it?

Leading with Values

I’ve had to learn that my values don’t change just because someone else breaks theirs. And if there’s one thing I’ve pulled from my experiences (and Jesus’s example), it’s this: betrayal shouldn’t pull you away from who you are. Just because the world can be harsh doesn’t mean I have to be. One of the most difficult lessons about being a business owner for me is this balance between wisdom and grace. On one hand, I’ve had to set clearer boundaries to protect myself and my ventures. I vet collaborators more carefully now and think twice before extending too much trust too quickly. But on the other hand, I still want to lead with love, kindness, and integrity.

The Risk of Trust

Business relationships, much like personal ones, require trust. And trust is risky. Every time you extend it, you’re putting yourself on the line. And while I used to hand out trust freely, I’ve come to see that it’s not about trusting less but about trusting smarter. What gives me hope is reflecting on the resilience Jesus displayed. Judas’s betrayal didn’t derail Him; He stayed focused on His mission. For me, that means betrayal doesn’t get the final say. Instead, it’s a moment to reset, to refocus on what really matters, and to keep moving forward.

Forgiving and Moving On

One of the hardest things about professional betrayal is learning to forgive. It’s easy to get stuck replaying betrayals in your head, carrying anger like a badge of honour. But forgiveness isn’t about excusing bad behaviour; it’s about freeing yourself to lead without bitterness weighing you down.

Holding on to Faith and Purpose

Whether in personal relationships or business, betrayal is an inevitable part of life. It shakes you, leaves you questioning your judgment, and can feel like a reason to shut yourself off from the world. But looking at Jesus’s experience reminds me that it’s not about avoiding betrayal, but about how you handle it when it comes.

I’ll leave you with this thought. Betrayal doesn’t reflect your worth; it reflects the choices of others. Your role in the story is how you respond.

For me, I choose to keep loving, keep trusting, and keep working toward something greater. Yes, I’ll set boundaries, and yes, I’ll move more carefully, but I won’t close my heart entirely.

If there’s one thing Jesus has shown me, it’s that the ability to love, forgive, and persevere is far stronger than any betrayal. And that, above all, is the legacy I want to live and lead by!